Dec 14, 201512:50 PMOh, Bother
Working mom in a Pinterest world. I mean well but I usually fall a bit short in the execution. You'll see.
By Meagan Feeser
An Ode to the Elf on the Shelf
It's the most frustrating time of the year
Get that elf on the she-el-lf
and don’t go to bed without moving him here!
It's the most harrying time of the year
It's the guiltiest season of all
With those Pint-er-est postings
and so many chances to drop the ball!
It's the mom-shamingest season of all
In a Barbie car coasting or
Hey, try powdered sugar for snow!
Ninja Turtle pizza party
Go ahead and get arty
Your kids will just love it, ya know!
It's the worst parenting time of the year
The elf will stay on the shelf
Disappointment in yourself
Is it time for a beer?
Put the elf away ‘til next year
Clearly, the Elf on the Shelf is a holiday tradition I wish I’d never started. Why did I do it? Holden was only six months old; she had no idea what the dumb elf was! I couldn’t even use him to threaten good holiday behavior at that point! But now I’m in too deep. She knows when the Christmas tree goes up, “Elfis” goes up on that dang shelf. And then he pretty much just stays there for a month and a half.
If you don’t know about the Elf on the Shelf, you can educate yourself here. Basically, he’s become a holiday terrorist.
If you search “Elf on the Shelf” on Pinterest, you find literally thousands of creative ideas to show the Elf running amok in your house. Look, I have two toddlers; I don’t need anyone else making a mess around here.
Now that I’m three years in on the Elf business, I’ve determined that these are my favorite Elf positions:
On top of the fireplace mantle
Sitting on the entertainment stand
Sitting on the window sill
Sitting on top of the kitchen cabinets
Hanging from the ceiling fan cord (my most creative!)
Perched in the Christmas Tree
Hanging on the dining room chandelier
Sitting in the bathroom hand towel ring
Straddling the stair bannister
In the same place he was yesterday
Feel free to go ahead and steal that list. Hey, there’s enough to worry about during the holidays.
Follow us over on oh, bother blog or on Instagram (@nomiddlenamemeg) to see how we’re surviving the season.